Regrets.

As I lay with my little tonight at bedtime, I realized how awful of a mother I am to him. I can't do much with/for him. He suffers most from my pain. I totally blame this on this injury, on this stupid pain. Why me? Why can't I have my life? What did I do to deserve this? Am I that bad of a person? 

The procedure failed. I'm worse now than before. I feel like my life is over.