Accepting Help

The Calvary is here.

I have help, the most humbling experience is to try and sit and just watch, to relax, to not NEED to get up because people think you are faking. To be with people who have seen your x-ray's and MRI's and understand physiologically what is going on with your back. To be with people who don't get angry with you when you do things but instead be a constant encouragement that it is OK to ask for help, it is OK to let go.

I only get this treatment for two weeks- then everyone must leave. I'm hoping that we will be closer to a fix for my issues before that happens. Lucky for me I have a mobile and supportive family who even down to my brother will sacrifice to help me in my time of need- and I them.

And the kids are THRIVING- truly living again. They are getting better nutrition (because people have the ability to prep) they are getting more than the recommended daily exercise that is recommended for their age. They have routine, they have visitors, they are playing. It is amazing to see that transformation in 2 days.

When I am alone I have a hard time keeping them safe- toys picked up, keeping things out of their reach. I can hardly care for their basic needs and my own. It becomes "I can do for them or myself but I cant do both". We spend days inside- they get barely 10 min of fresh air. My TV is always on- I just need something to keep them off me. There is lots of cuddle time- but not a lot of running. The kids dont make it out of their PJ's and they don't get baths no matter how dirty they get.

Now I'm considering buying Big a bike- because there is someone else to teach Big. Litle naps a billion times better!

Having help is truly better. I'm very blessed.